Transgender Inclusive Communication

This tip sheet aims to provide employees with tools for using language that is inclusive of transgender and nonbinary people. But for any group of colleagues, a first step can be acknowledging that the experiences of transgender staff may vary, and so the suggestions in this guide are not a one-size-fits-all approach. Gender identities are personal and sometimes private, and not everyone is comfortable openly sharing theirs. Please continue to be in communication with your colleagues, to ask for their input when appropriate, and to be respectful of what they need.

Key takeaways

• Ensure that you are using the correct pronouns for your colleagues.
• If you are unsure of someone’s pronouns, check available resources (such as someone’s user name on a video conferencing platform, email signature, or your company’s internal staff directory). If you are still unsure, ask them to confirm.
• Use gender-neutral terms when referring to individuals and groups.
• If someone chooses not to share their pronouns, respect their privacy.
• Allies set the tone for an inclusive workplace by sharing their pronouns, correctly using their colleagues' pronouns, and correcting instances of misgendering.
• Following these guidelines will help make your workplace a more inclusive and comfortable space for everyone.

Transgender is a term for people whose gender identity is different from the gender they were thought to be at birth. “Trans” may be used as shorthand for transgender. Transgender can also be used as an umbrella term for any person whose gender identity is outside of the binary, such as people who are gender fluid or nonbinary.

Here are some ways you can learn more about gender identity:

• Familiarize yourself with this glossary of relevant terms¹. Definitions vary across communities and individuals. Respect and mirror the language people use to describe themselves.
• Watch the following videos.

Asking for and correctly using someone’s pronouns is a starting point for displaying respect for their gender identity. Avoid assuming anyone’s gender or pronouns. You cannot know this information by looking at someone, by hearing their voice, or from their name.

People have different feelings about sharing elements of their personal life in the workplace. In some contexts, trans people might be uncomfortable sharing their pronouns. If someone chooses not to share their pronouns, respect their privacy.

Examples of pronouns include the following:⁴

• She/her—“She wrote that book herself. Those ideas are hers. I like both her and her ideas.”
• He/him—“He wrote that book himself. Those ideas are his. I like both him and his ideas.”
• They/them—“They wrote that book themself. Those ideas are theirs. I like both them and their ideas.”
• Ze/zir—“Ze wrote that book zirself. Those ideas are zirs. I like both zir and zirs ideas.”
• No pronouns—Person requests you only use the person’s name. For example, for someone whose name is Lan, “Lan wrote that book. Those ideas are Lan’s. I like both Lan and Lan’s ideas.”

You won’t always know when you’re interacting with transgender people. Introducing yourself with pronouns signals to all colleagues that this is a place where trans people are welcome and are intentionally included. It also reminds everyone not to make assumptions about gender identity. Below are some practices and examples of language you can use to set a respectful, inclusive tone in various work situations.

• When working with a colleague for the first time, offer them an opportunity to share their pronouns in your email introduction or in your first meeting. You can also check colleagues’ email signatures and your internal staff directory for pronouns.

  Give colleagues a chance to share their pronouns: “Please let me know if there’s anything else you would like to share as we get started (your name pronunciation, pronouns, work hours, or something else).”

• Use pronouns in your introductions for all individual and group meetings. Pronoun usage might change over time, and some people might use more than one set of pronouns. Continue to encourage colleagues to share pronouns in introductions at meetings throughout the duration of a project or task cycle.

  Start meeting introductions with pronouns: “To kick off the meeting let’s introduce ourselves! I’m Zach, I’m excited to work with you on this project team, I use they/them or he/him.”

• Inclusivity is particularly important when interacting with recruitment candidates. Refrain from assuming the pronouns of recruitment candidates, share your pronouns with candidates, and encourage them to do the same. Correct misgendering as appropriate (see “What does it mean to misgender someone?”).

  Using the wrong pronouns in advance of meeting a candidate can lead to later use of the wrong pronouns. If you don’t know the candidate’s pronouns, try using the candidate’s name or “the candidate.”

Misgendering is when you refer to a person using language that does not align with their gender or their pronouns. When someone is misgendered, they might feel disrespected, invalidated, dismissed, alienated, or dysphoric (or, often, all of the above).

Here are some ways to address and avoid mistakes:

• If you catch yourself misgendering someone or are corrected after misgendering someone, make a brief and discrete apology, correct your pronoun usage, and move forward (for example, “Sorry, their idea about data collection…”)
• If you realize your mistake after the fact, you might want to reach out in private and acknowledge your actions.
• After a mistake, practice saying the correct pronoun aloud (especially for pronouns unfamiliar to you). This website can be useful for practice.
• If you know you made a mistake, but you are unsure of exactly how to use the pronoun, try searching for tips and examples on the Internet or using the resources included in this tip sheet.
• Avoid over-apologizing or drawing more attention to the misgendering. It might make the person you misgendered feel uncomfortable and might also make them feel responsible for your feelings of embarrassment or guilt.

Transgender people’s experiences with and reactions to being misgendered can be varied. Some people might be vocal about correcting those who misgender them, and others might not want to draw attention to the misgendering. Also, some people might be comfortable with other people correcting misgendering on their behalf, while others might not. If you notice a colleague being misgendered, let that colleague correct the misgendering if they choose; don't step in yourself. Likewise, if you notice a colleague being misgendered when they aren’t present, be sure to check with the colleague first before correcting the misgendering. In general, if you’re not sure how your colleagues feel about these issues, ask them, and be respectful of their requests.

Trans people don’t have a responsibility to explain their gender identity or expression

Gender identity and expression are deeply personal, and everyone should have the autonomy to decide when and what personal information gets shared with whom. Imagine, for example, if someone asked about your personal medical history or finances. Questions about an individual’s gender identity, expression, or both are just as inappropriate and intrusive.

Examples of what not to ask include the following:

• Don’t ask “What was your name before you went by _____ ?”
• Don’t ask “Why do you dress like that?”
• Don’t ask “So, have you had surgery yet?”

Ongoing discrimination related to gender identity and expression might also contribute to individual decisions regarding when, where, and with whom someone shares this information.